Archive for January 24th, 2010

January 24, 2010

My wife is addicted to her cellphone….

by Rod Smith

“My wife is addicted to her cell phone. Nothing I say or do will convince her otherwise. The woman is constantly on her phone talking or text-messaging. She sleeps with her phone, clutching it like a child may clutch a stuffed toy. She cannot bear to have her phone out of her sight for even a minute. My wife has even text-ed people during sex! Forget about having a conversation or watching a movie together. It just isn’t going to happen. I have tried to discuss this issue with her but she just stares back at me. All attempts at meaningful conversation or at just spending time together are nothing more than exercises in futility. What really hurts me is the fact that my wife, who is an intelligent woman, does not see the problem or, if she does, she refuses to get help. In the meantime, I am lost. My wife is literally destroying our marriage and refuses to do anything about it.”

ACT, Australia

FROM JEAN HATTON in AUSTRALIA: Have you considered getting through to your wife by texting her yourself? If this is the only kind of communication that she immerses herself in, perhaps you can let her know your struggle via your own cell.

The fact that she texts even during sex causes me to wonder what the health of your marriage was like before she became addicted to her cell. State (Text) your case and comments to her and then find help for what your options are concerning your marriage relationship.

Reacting to her will only send you deeper into your own powerlessness.

Self-examine, first.....

Rod’s response: Dozen of facetious responses have crossed my mind, but I’ll resist. Your marriage, wife, and consequently you, require a powerful, face-to-face professional intervention.

This inordinate attachment cannot occur in a vacuum – so I’d suggest the phone is a symptom and not the cause.

Begin with ruthless self-assessment.