Now that we are retired we are “too much together”….

by Rod Smith

“My wife bickers at me all the time. It’s like it’s going on under her breath from early in the morning until late at night. We have been married for 40 years and our children all live overseas and it’s like she blames me that she is not near her children and her grandchildren. We are now both very recently retired and you’d think we’d be glad we reached this stage in life. We are too much together. She says it. I did not feel it until she said it. She is on email all day looking for letters from the children and the grandchildren and sometimes she won’t even go out if she is expecting them to phone. What can I do? Please help.”

It is counter-intuitive, I know......

Everything needs space.

This is a fine, yet somewhat exaggerated, example of how careers and children can keep a man and a woman sufficiently apart AND where the apartness facilitates and fosters tolerance of one another.

Take away the careers (and children) and people have to look at each other again and they do not always like what they see. Retirement is new for you both. Stick it out.

Volunteer your services somewhere. Really, it will get better.

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