Archive for January 11th, 2011

January 11, 2011

I don’t want his daughter living with us…..

by Rod Smith

“My boyfriend has a 6-year-old daughter who is a wonderful little girl. She likes me and we get along well. However, my boyfriend has a horrible relationship with his daughter’s mother and I’ve witnessed horrible battles while he was on the phone with her. He says he never gives her any money and instead, buys his daughter things she needs because he felt the money wasn’t going to the child. His daughter lives with her mother and older siblings in a ‘bad neighborhood’ and my boyfriend has mentioned gaining custody of his daughter. I don’t want to seem like a terrible person but I’m not ready to be mommy to a 6-year-old. I’m pregnant with my first baby, which would be his second. I’m just not ready for her to move in. We’re considering marriage in the next two years. Any suggestions?”

Your power over your domestic circumstances is restricted by pre-existing relationships in the life of the man whom you are marrying. He is a dad. That he has a daughter, and that he will want to do what it best for his daughter will probably be non-negotiable. This will not be an easy journey for you or your unborn child given the acrimony already in the system.