“I am a Muslim girl in a 8-year relationship with a Christian boy. We both are 23. Religion is the only problem. He does not agree with becoming a Muslim – he believes I should follow his faith from the day we are married. Our families have not tried to break us up but my family insists on him becoming Muslim. His family insists I become Christian. We are extremely committed to each and I know he feels the same. The major problem is his meddling Christian sister who keeps bringing it up. Wherever we go people are amazed that he’s got a Muslim girlfriend and demand to know what his Muslim name is going to be and if he doesn’t change his name, religion, and get circumcised, that my family will kill him. How ridiculous. Strangers’ words affect him and I don’t know what to do. Breaking up is not an option!”

External pressure will intensify your love. Never under-estimate the power of invisible loyalties that each of you has with each extended family. These pressures will unify you before marriage but will work against you once you are. There is no easy answer. In all circumstances (especially to parents) speak only for yourself, and let him do likewise.