Archive for September 21st, 2009

September 21, 2009

We are “one flesh” are we not?

by Rod Smith

“I was interested in your article about the ‘controlling husband’ investigating his wife’s every move that she ‘secures her privacy’. I always have felt that my cell phone, and the cell phone of my wife, should be interchangeable and left anywhere in the house for either person to use or answer should it ring. Likewise my emails can be left open and whatever comes in and out is for her to see if she wants. I’m opting for ‘one flesh’ and as such operate in unison. The beauty about ‘open communication’ at all levels is that it is quickly noticeable when someone is doing something ‘slimy’. I’m opting for this more relaxed and open model.” (Edited)



Of course it is perfectly fine to be as open as you want to be with phones and emails but the husband in the situation to which you refer is stalking, prying, demanding that everything in his wife’s life is his business. He wants to own her. This is not being “one flesh” but emotional cannibalism.

You are looking to be “two people in one boat” which I will suggest is ultimately exhausting. “Two people in two boats” I’d suggest you will find far more interesting and refreshing.