Archive for October 9th, 2008

October 9, 2008

My wife and friend have had a five-year affair……

by Rod Smith

“My best friend moved next door to us while his wife was selling their home in another city. While waiting he enjoyed a five-year sexual relationship with my wife. I had evidence to substantiate the affair, which my wife denied. I have not confronted my best friend, nor have I told his wife. I am sure his wife would likely want to pay back both of our spouses by conducting an affair with me. Believe me, it is all I can do to not do exactly that. I am still married, though not convinced that it is entirely over between them. But it is not the way it should be. I should not have to circumvent their sexual activities by spying. I have not sat her down to tell her that I am more than suspicious that it happened. Should I talk with both?” (Letter shortened)

Five years! And you are living under the same roof as your wife? I’d suggest there is something more fundamentally amiss with your marriage that playing “pay back” with his wife most certainly will not fix. Of course you should talk about this. I’d suggest a paid professional to moderate your meetings so you can get the best out of a very toxic situation.