Archive for October 1st, 2008

October 1, 2008

I am too nice….. thanks for yesterday…..

by Rod Smith

I loved “Helpful starters to counter any negative conversations” (You and Me, 1/10/08). In tense situations, I let others get the better of me as I always think of an appropriate response after the moment has passed, which is so frustrating! My friends have told me that I’m too “nice” and I allow people to speak to me in the manner in which they do. I let people criticize me and can never think of a suitable timely response. But the column you published today will help me greatly. Please can you send me more stuff like this?

Some kinds of “nice” are not helpful. Helpful “nice” is when truth is directly and lovingly expressed, even if the content of your message is tough or uncomfortable. With this said, it is also helpful to know that not everything you see, think, or feel needs to be expressed in every encounter. Sometimes silence – in response to someone wishing to pick a fight – is perfectly “nice” and appropriate.

Know yourself before you assert yourself. Invest deeply in the people who are important to you and, because you hold them in high regard, take no nonsense from them.