If you fall in love (or are friends) with a man or a woman who reveals having had a very difficult childhood there are a few things of which you may want to be aware.

Keep in mind that I am only one voice in a vastly explored arena. It is usually a good idea to get lots of insights from several sources.

Sad thing is that if you have already fallen in love you probably won’t be looking for help.

If you are, it’s because you’ve already begun to see how tough it is to love tough-historied people. (I rather like my euphemism).

“Troubled” or “unsettled” are pejorative terms.

Avoid them.

People from tough backgrounds can be very exciting, motivated and “world-changing” people.

If you are going to be partners you have to learn and understand what kind of music is playing in their heads and hearts and how they dance to it or turn it up or turn it down or turn it off (if they ever can).

They will often be way ahead of most people in terms of being street wise. They have had to be. They have been watching, negotiating, recruiting, debating and have had to have an eye for undercurrents for so long such behaviors are a way of life for them.

They will usually be cunningly intelligent but also possess zero desire to bring harm to you or others.

More about this sometime….