Archive for February 16th, 2023

February 16, 2023

Essential message to……

by Rod Smith

Dear Roomful Teenage Girls and Young Adult Women:

There’s much I’d like to say. I know people hear and learn according to readiness for both. Sometimes learning requires pain, even desperation. It always requires humility. It won’t surprise me if you think I have nothing to teach you. Either way, here goes:

You don’t NEED a man. If you WANT one, and don’t NEED one, you will be amazed at the different quality of men you will meet. Desperation emits messages unhealthy men find very attractive.

This doesn’t, of course, mean that I think you should not date or pursue marriage. I want you to know you are ENOUGH already, you don’t need a man to help you be something that you cannot already be on your own. Reject the term “other half” or “better half” – it’s nonsense. You are not a “half” waiting for some man to be made whole!

When the time is right, seek a MUTUAL and EQUAL and RESPECTFUL relationship. It will challenge, sharpen, and, yes, “improve” you. It’s got to be all three from the outset. You can’t easily import them into a relationship once it has started.

Don’t chase anyone for anything. Chase only a fine education.

February 16, 2023

Say something

by Rod Smith

If you must say something make it loving and beautiful and accurate, unless you’re making up a story for a child then make it wild, wonderful and full of mystery, myth and energy.

If you say something try to be affirming with the knowledge that everything you say exposes your inner-world given that we love, see and speak to a world not as it is, but as we are.

If you say something try to avoid “you need,” and “you must,” and “you ought” when addressing adults as if you’re more qualified at life and living than they are. Yes, of course it’s ok to recommend things but you know full well when suggestions dress up as manipulations, as coercion, as willing another, arm-wrestling another, into a preferred shape or form.

If you say something, before it leaves your mouth check if it’s good seed and may grow or stone and may wound on reaching your intended audience. While you’re at it, run it through your grandmother’s filter who probably told you you never need to swear or blaspheme.

If you must say something, consider briefly if what you want to say may require an apology in the near or distant future.