Archive for September 5th, 2010

September 5, 2010

The challenge of intimacy

by Rod Smith

Intimacy is hard to find

Lay aside the commonly held connection of intimacy with sexual behavior. See it as an essential platform for any meaningful relationship.

Intimacy occurs when I let you into my head, heart, and reality – without fearing that you will disapprove of what you see. I let you in, and my hope is that you will love me and accept me. I don’t want you to rummage around, judge my thoughts, or be startled. I don’t want you to rearrange the furniture or paint the walls. We discover intimacy when you enter my world and you behave a valued, respectful guest. You are a guest, not a consultant or an interior decorator or a demolition expert. I want you to know me so you can treasure me and understand me and enjoy me – so don’t try to change or fix me.

Authentic Intimacy (there’s no other kind) is not easy. You have to know yourself really well, possess a high degree of self-acceptance and self-love. In the event you do not love and accept yourself, the moment you enter my world, the experience will be so unsettling for you that you will either take an emotional hike or you’ll feel like you have to be a missionary or nurse and fix whatever I show you.