Archive for September 2nd, 2010

September 2, 2010

A dad writes…..

by Rod Smith

A dad writes….

“Perhaps the thing that surprises me most, among many things that do, about being a dad, is the fact that when my children suffer or are in trouble, it affects me physically. I feel literally ill when my children are ill. I feel pain and distress when my children are discontent. It gets me in the gut in a way I never dreamed possible. It can almost ruin my day just to know one of them is upset. Now you might think I have no boundaries or that I am enmeshed with my children but I would not agree. My children and I are very separate in some ways and very close in other ways. I have a very full life apart from them – so I think I have good boundaries. Yet, we are connected. It is uncanny. I can look at my children and tell you what mood they are in and they can almost do the same with me. I have to work very hard at not letting everything that hurts them make me jump to their rescue. I am embarrassed to say that sometimes I need a break from my children. It’s not that I don’t love them, it is that everything is often so intense.”