“My first six months of marriage has bee absolutely miserable. I love him with all my heart. He has become my whole existence. I am a friendly person and people tend like me. My husband takes it as flirting. We no longer work together so it’s worse since now he can’t keep an eye on me. I am not allowed to wear make up, do my hair, or wear perfume. If I do I’m trying to sleep with somebody. He checks my phone and Email and questions me on every call and every text. I would never cheat. I try to convince him but nothing works. I do everything he wants yet he finds reasons to get upset. This has changed me as a person. I no longer enjoy life. I have pushed my friends away. I don’t ever want to leave him but I don’t how to improve our marriage. Will counseling help?”
Counseling won’t help while you are unwilling to change your behavior. The more you surrender your legitimate, God-given power, the more of your legitimate, God-given power he will assume, until the “you” in you (your uniqueness, your ability to think for yourself) disappears altogether.Stop doing everything he wants. Your husband has an emotional virus – and, it is most unloving to feed it. While you try to appease it, not only are you attempting the impossible, it will only get worse.
His jealousy has NOTHING to do with you or your behavior. It is HIS issue and while you make it yours, you will never be able to do enough to appease it.