Archive for August 14th, 2007

August 14, 2007

A stepchild writes…

by Rod Smith

“Stepchildren are not guests in the stepparents’ households but were usually there first. In the eyes of the stepchild, they are not at fault for the mess and were thrown into the disruption. Divorce is a selfish thing. However, this does not mean that they are allowed to run the house, but they need love and kindness from stepparents. I feel very unwelcome in my father’s house. I have not been allowed to have a good relationship with my father, although I have tried everything. I feel disrespected. Children really need to know that both of their parents support them. They need their stepparents to respect and support the (biological) relationship.

“A wise decision for a stepmother is to leave the discipline to the father for a time, until they have established a caring relationship with their stepchild. They need to know their stepparent will allow them to feel comfortable as part of the family and not be excluded because they are not their children. They need to be careful to not come between the child and her biological parent. They need to realize that the child just wants to feel loved and cared for by all. This requires a lot of patience and understanding.” (Edited for space)