Rather than be present in spirit only, one Sunday, Jesus decided it was time for him to preach at First Church and so he woke Pastor Larry in the early hours of Sunday to inform him.

“Is that really you God?” Larry questioned.

“Yes,” said Jesus, “it’s Me. You have heard correctly. Shelve your sermon. I will preach today.”

The pastor tossed and turned so much so that his wife said in soothing tones, “You know how you need your rest, honey.”

Half dazed, Larry explained that Jesus had just met him in a dream in which He requested the pulpit.

“But the PAC, the ‘Pulpit Approval Committee’,” appealed his wife, “Have they approved Jesus to preach?”

Larry shushed her backed to sleep and then wondered how Jesus would show up and deliver the sermon.

That morning, after the hymns and the general announcements Larry anticipated a miracle that would really put First Church on the map. He imagined Christians traveling from all over the world to see the church where Jesus preached. He saw himself, the keynote speaker at conferences all over the world, telling of the night he trusted his dream, of the night Jesus talked to him and of the Sunday morning Jesus showed up and took over his pulpit.

Larry sat in their family pew while the confused congregation waited for the sermon.

The silence was deafening.

Larry trusted his dream and refused to preach.

“Well, this is quite the most unusual service I have attended,” said Elder Crabb as he made his way slowly into the pulpit. “Since no one is preaching, I have something to say. Last month when my wife died,” he started, “the world seemed to end for me. But you were there, Mrs. Jones, Johnny, Sid, Pastor Larry, and I wanted to thank you,” he said, making eye contact with each of the persons he mentioned. “Thank you for your constant love, the food, cards and gifts. Thanks also, all of you, for being at the funeral.”

He sat down. Quiet sobbing spread throughout the congregation.

“Well since we’re thanking others,” said Miss Betty, tottering to the front of the sanctuary, “I wanted to say how much I appreciate the yard work done at my home by the youth group. I can no longer get myself out to do it. Oh, and, I would also like to apologize for the way in which I have resisted young people in the past. I struggled with your music and youth sermons, but your help with the lawn was all I needed to show me I was wrong. You mow lawns better than you preach.”

The congregation applauded.

This was better than Pastor had ever anticipated and soon a line of people waited at the pulpit and every thanks received a warm applause.

Members began to hold hands across the congregation even though the sermon had run much longer than the expected twenty-one minutes. No one was clock-watching.

To everyone’s surprise a young child found his way into the pulpit, and, as if he had done it many times before. He moved Larry’s pulpit chair into position, and stood tall upon it.

“I do not really have anything to say,” he said with confidence, “I just have a few questions.”

Larry and congregation moved expectantly in their seats toward him, every person willing to address the theological quandaries of the young.

“How come some of you are rich and yet you do not give to those you know are poor?”

People coughed nervously.

“Why do you spend so much money on yourselves? There are poor people in every direction that could use your help? Why are some of you fighting amongst yourselves? What are you doing about AIDS, injustice, racism and world hunger?”

“The Lord started out so well,” reflected Larry, peering at his shoes, “and then a child goes and ruins it by asking political questions.”

“I am not done preaching yet,” said the Lord to Larry.

“Oh Lord,” said Larry, “I am sorry your sermon was interrupted by this child.”

“No, no,” said the Lord to Larry, “It’s me. This is the sermon. I am preaching, Larry. You have all done quite well at caring for each other. Now get busy, rid the world of injustice and prejudice. And by the way, keeping loving each other while your are at it.”

When Jesus Went to First Church

When Jesus sat between Walter Grumley and his wife, in the fifteenth row of First Church on Sunday morning, for some reason, in all of his infinite wisdom, He did not realize the stir that would arise. This began an unfortunate snowball or wave effect throughout the congregation. At least twelve families were displaced, each by one seat.

As people begrudgingly moved they tried to communicate a welcome to the stranger (so he would be sure to return) laced with enough censure to make sure he would be put in his place (or at least not in theirs) the next time he visited. This uncharacteristic reshuffling moved everyone for the first time in years.

The disruption extended the announcements sufficiently to annoy the choir waiting, fully robed, at the entrance to the sanctuary, hymnbooks in hand.

“I suppose of all people, I should have known better,” mused Jesus, all the while seeing the humor in Mr. Grumley’s polite, yet uncomfortable response after Jesus whispered His name to Grumley during the Passing of the Peace.

Grumley moved side to side, a tad excited with the growing implications at this revelation. Not only did his surroundings take on a new look, he wanted to draw attention to the guest. Wally wanted to let all the disrupted and displaced faithfuls know the inconvenience of having guests in church was worth it.

Alas, Introduction of Visitors was already over and the Congregational Needs were being announced. Besides, the choir was beginning to manifest its annoyance while standing just outside the doors. Unaccustomed as they were to being “out of the loop,” word had already gotten to them (it was usually the other way around) via the deacons, that a Stranger had not only entered the building but had sat right in Wally Grumley’s seat. The choir, usually first on everything, would be the very last to witness this unprecedented incident and, it had ruined, for the fist time in 40 years, the procession.

“Tell them I am here,” said Jesus to Grumley.

“Go on. Stand up. Say I am here.”

“You mean interrupt Congregational Needs?” whispered Grumley with a faint but gentle shush in his voice in an attempt to keep Jesus quiet.

“I am terribly sorry, but I am afraid we just do not do that here,” said Grumley in his library voice.

“What if I am telling you to do so?” persisted Jesus. “After all, the pastor just said, that if two or three are gather in my name then I am in the midst of them? So, go on tell them he’s right and I am here.”

Wally Grumley peered across Jesus to his wife.

“You do it Joy, you always said you would obey Jesus if he said something directly to you.”

“I think he is talking to you, Wally,” said Joy, her eyes fixed on pulpit proceedings, totally unimpressed with her husband’s freedom with strangers.

“Well, actually, I am talking to you both,” said Jesus rather loudly.

“You are interrupting my worship experience,” said Joy with an air of finality.

“I have come here to meet with God if you don’t mind.”

“I am God. And, I am… err, here to be met.”

“Well, God just wouldn’t do it like this,” said Grumley’s wife, her teeth now clenched,  “God just wouldn’t just barge into our church and….”

She was lost for words.

“Do you believe I am here?” quizzed Jesus. “Well of course I believe you are here,” replied Wally.

“Then go ahead and tell them I am here.”

Joy tilted her head a hairbreadth toward her husband: “Will you stop talking during the service. Even if it is to Jesus! If you don’t I am going to a quieter spot where I can enter the spirit of worship without interruption.”

The pastor’s voice boomed from the lower pulpit: “I will be challenging you to treat any stranger as you would treat Jesus, in my message today, which I will preach from the upper pulpit, entitled Church Hospitality.”

Wally and Jesus looked at each other, and, after a moment, they burst into uproarious laughter, embraced like long lost friends and moved into the aisle in a celebratory dance. Wally, catching the pastor’s voice a little above the commotion caused by his newfound joy heard, “And now the choir will lead us, the choir will lead us, THE CHOIR WILL LEAD US in our opening hymn: Stand Up Stand Up for Jesus” as the deacons ushered the exuberant pair out the door.

“I had a year-long relationship with a married man. I say ‘relationship’ because I was not aware that he was married. I am grieving. When he confessed it was the first time that he told me he loved me and was afraid to lose me. He admitted he was separated but financial circumstances pushed him to his wife. We tried to bargain for a month. It was difficult because the emotions were strong. A part of me did not want to let go. I realized I was settling for whatever I could take. So painfully, I let him go and cut ties. I told his wife and apologized. I know it was partly an act of vengeance, but also I know that by saying that to the wife, I would keep my word. He wasn’t ready to let go. I did not want to stay trapped. I’m trying to move on but still cry a lot. I don’t know how to vent my anger. I am still hoping I made the right decision. I need more strength to rebuild myself.” (Minimal edits)

The part of you that cut ties, that apologized, that decided you were “settling” is the part of you that will help you thrive. Keep listening to that voice!

“I have been dating this guy for a year. We are both 30. He is jealous and insecure and would not let me hang out with my guy friends without accusing me of sleeping with them. I started limiting my outings because he used to fight and call me names like ‘characterless woman.’ He saw me texting at dinner and demanded to know who I was texting and when I refused to tell him he started accusing me in front of the hotel staff that I cheated on. He snatched my phone from me and threatened to break it. He would not let me get out of the car or drop me home till I answered his questions even though I repeatedly told him I have not cheated. When he finally dropped me home I forbade him from coming in and asked him leave me alone. He slapped me and abused me and left. Please tell me what to do?”

What to do? Report him to the police, get a restraining or a peace order against him, and NEVER see him again. This is not a “boyfriend” – “friend” suggests pleasure, joy, and freedom, and there is none of that here. He might be insecure and have “control issues” but you are the one dating him.

“I need help with understanding my son-in-law. He is very controlling of my daughter. They have been married three years. I wasn’t allowed to visit them when he was home and then it was very limited to how long I could stay. They only lived 3 miles away. They have a baby. I’m allowed to see them when he is working. They have moved thirty miles away. He works shifts so I can go see them every third day. He thought I wouldn’t travel that far to see them that often but I do. His family will not go more than 25 miles from their house. Now he has decided that I see the baby more than his mom sees her. My daughter said that is her fault because she is welcome to visit. He refuses to go see any family or be around either side. He likes to see his friends. She is older than he is. He is very immature and insecure. He likes to play video games all day. He has to know everything she does, he calls 10 or so times and text her all day when he works. It is hard to visit why my daughter with all the calls and texting. She doesn’t want him to know how much I visit. What is the best way to handle him? Can I do anything that would help? He says if he sees family once a month that is more than enough for him. She had a friend that drove sixteen hours to see her and he had every excuse in the world for her not to see her. See hadn’t seen her in a year and they were best friends. She can’t seem to see he is controlling her live. What do we do?”

Call me

You are powerless over your son-in-law and your daughter. I’d suggest you gently and repeatedly ask your daughter if her life (marriage, motherhood, relationships with you and her extended family) is how she hoped her life would be – and LISTEN to her answers. Do not judge her answers, comment on what you see, or make any suggestions. Just listen.

Your assessment is that your son-in-law is “very immature and insecure”. While this may be so, your daughter found him sufficiently appealing to go ahead and marry him. People are attracted to those who are equally mature or immature. If you “corner” your daughter about him, it is likely she will side with him and then you will lose access to your daughter and your grandchild.

Change will come only when your daughter sees how much she allows his controlling behaviors to succeed. Until then, you will dance on eggshells in much the same way as she already does – if this is what you choose to do.

“I am in my late twenties. My wife is a few years older than I am. She feels that it is time she has children. I feel unready and unstable to have child. I know that biologically she should have children now. I worry that life could become even more tricky. I very much want to please her but I want to be true to myself. I just can’t stand to see her sad. I also have reservations about bringing children up in the modern world/city and would rather do it in a rural setting. I don’t want life to spiral out of control.” (Minimal edits)

You will never be ready if you wait. Babies make you ready for children and you can’t get ready without one. Increase your tolerance for your wife’s sadness. The presence of another person in your family will pull you both through the full spectrum of emotions and some sadness will be inevitable. Also, you are apparently forgetting that your unborn child may become a crucial key to a better world. As a parent of two adopted boys I’d have no hesitation whatsoever doing it all again. My children have blessed the world far more than it has managed to scare or damage them.