“A friend brought your column to my notice this morning. I cannot believe it! It’s like you were reading my mind! I’m trapped in my marriage of 27 years. My husband and I hardly communicate as he disagrees with everything I say. I have now chosen to communicate as little as possible in order for us not to get into an argument. I too walk on eggshells of fear of saying or doing the wrong thing. Everything around the home has to be done his way. My suggestions just fall by the wayside. He has not been able to contribute financially for years so maybe this is his way of retaining his ‘head of the family’ role. I think I’ve written to you ten years ago and nothing has changed since. Maybe I need to change. I’ve been unhappy for so long that I may never have a normal relationship again.”

Ten years is a small price to pay to learn that you are the one who might need to do some changing – many people never discover this.  If your husband is unable to manage his own happiness, why on earth would you think he can take care of yours?

Gather trusted women.

Carefully (slowly) hatch a plan.

Implement it.

Take back your future.

[If you want something better in the future than you have had in the past it won’t just happen to you. You must engage in the planning, you have to do something different in the present, if you want the future to look different from the present and the past.]