Archive for July 17th, 2010

July 17, 2010

I was not allowed to meet his adult children….

by Rod Smith

“I lived through the humiliation of not being allowed to meet my lover’s adult children. This was his reasoning: he went through a long and protracted divorce (still not settled) and meeting them would ignite his wife and she would fight for more money if she knew about me. He expected me to listen to him talk about and shop for his children I was not allowed to meet. When they came to town I was to hide away and not show my face.” (Adapted from website comment)

Come out of hiding...Expecting you to hide from his children is his manner of copping out, of avoiding his unresolved issues with his immediate family. If he can’t “own up” to you, publically and privately, for anyone to know and meet, he’s not ready for an authentic relationship with you.

How honest is he being with anyone (especially you) if he is willing to lie to his adult children?

Your presence in his life is no more able to ignite an almost-ex wife to demand, and then get more money from divorce proceedings, than your presence would be able to ignite their former passion. He is the one hiding. His refusal to face his family ought not suggest you have dome something worthy of shame.