Personal Responsibility appears to be sadly lacking from many letters I read. Living the “blame-game” poisons vision (until it is destroyed), leads to thinking like a victim (and then behaving like one). It makes people hypersensitive (picky, irritable, short-tempered) in close relationships. Perhaps saddest of all, avoiding personal responsibility takes the fun out of living. I reverse this toxic condition (when I notice it rearing its ugly head within me) through simple, but not easy, shifts in my attitude:

1. I acknowledge that I am where I am because of my own set of choices, my own deep-seated emotional make-up, and my own complex history, and I take full responsibility for who and what I am.
2. While I cannot be held responsible for the choices others have made and which have influenced the trajectory my life, I am responsible (as an adult) for my reactions and responses to their choices.
3. I shall ask the question “what is my role in this?” when facing situations where I feel trapped by unpleasant realities or circumstances.
4. I shall remove my focus from others and what others may or may not have done, and consider my role, my part in how things develop in my life.