Am I doing the right thing….?

by Rod Smith

My husband of 15 years has been having an affair for 5 years and he still denies it. He sends the other woman text messages everyday saying how much he loves her. I asked him to decide whom he really wants and not to let me stand in their way of happiness. If he loves her I’ll set him free even though this will hurt the children but I cannot stay with someone who doesn’t love me. Otherwise he is a very good husband and father. Am I doing the right thing? (Minimal edits)

Essential to being a “good husband and a good father” is emotional, physical, and financial faithfulness. While your husband is invested in romantic pursuits outside of the marriage all he is really good at is make believe.

No one can tell you the “right thing” to do. This is something you have to decide.

It seems both your husband and the other woman have little dissonance regarding their duplicity.

The inner-part of you that cannot tolerate the pretense, or the lie, or playing second fiddle, is the healthy part of you, and it ought not to be denied or silenced.

3 Comments to “Am I doing the right thing….?”

  1. Hard place to be in. You know the answer, follow your inner voice.

  2. Send him out on the street, he has disrespected you enough. Make things easy for him and decide FOR YOURSELF that you don’t deserve this, you have given your LIFE.

  3. Leave him! If someone can have children with you and play house with someone else it’s time for him to “play house”. You need to have more self confidence in yourself. You know what to do and set the example for your children to expect nothing less. Keeping them in this enviroment only hurts thier future. Seriously pull it together and do what you need to do. If I were your friend we would drink lots of wine and get you through this. I am sorry you are going through this but please have more self respect for yourself and I PROMISE YOU your children will be better people from it as long as you do not bring any other LOSERS in your home.

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