Abusive mother…..

by Rod Smith

Referring to Axiom #22

“You often write to promote a good relationship with your parents. What if your parents are both narcissistic abusers (according to professional psychologists), and you’re their scapegoat and they keep emotionally and verbally abusing you even when you’re all grown up? Should you keep chatting with and telling your mother everything about you still? She projects her garbage while acting holier than thou and takes cheap shots every chance she gets. Doesn’t seem like a very wise idea. Seems better to cut off abusers. Some people’s parents do in fact have character disorders. You can be as nice, as tolerant, as patient, or as appropriately assertive as possible and nothing ever changes. On top of that she’s an alcoholic.” (Edited)

If you have read
my work for any length of time you will see that there are always exceptions. Yes. There are indeed times when an adult son or daughter is better off without contact with a parent when the parental bond is so damaged. Of course self-preservation trumps entering connection that damages again and again and again. These extremes are sufficient reason for severance – of course.

Outside of these and similar extremes it remains almost impossible for a person to remain in enduring emotional wellness if he or she disconnects from his or her parents.

One Comment to “Abusive mother…..”

  1. Thanks, Rod.

    I have not read much of your work, I just found your site (and Bowen’s principles) a few days ago.

    Thank you for the reply.

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