The more I see, the more I am ready to call it quits…

by Rod Smith

“I have a girlfriend (35) with children ages 18, 17, 14, 13, and a granddaughter who just turned 1. The 17-year-old is the mother of this child. I am 28. Everything started well until I was laid off from work. Now we are all together more. It’s funny how things come to light when you are around more. These kids are very clever at school but their behavior is


Tough call for anyone....

very nerve wrecking. They lack respect for others and are very inconsiderate. Every time they do something wrong, its brushed off and they are showered with gifts. I’ve repeatedly expressed how displeased I am with their actions. The more things that happen and the more that I see the more I’m ready to call it quits.”

This would be a tough context for anyone to enter – not because this family is necessarily more difficult than any other, but because there are so many established relationships and permutations that pre-exist you. You won’t “fix” the children or their mother – but you will have to decide how resilient you are in the face of at least 6 people who will all see you, at least at times, as an intruder. I say “at least” because you have made no mention of the fathers of the children or the grandchild. Anyone who was here “before” will feel as if he or she has more rights and more say than you do when there is pressure in the family.

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