Archive for September 24th, 2008

September 24, 2008

Email used for destructive ends in family…

by Rod Smith

“A family member has utilized emails to catastrophic ends in our whole family. In particular he aimed them at a person who has repeatedly saved him in financial difficulties. Added, he has a destructive relationship with his son. The son left home and cannot see his way clear to reuniting with his father. Any conversation result in lengthy emails about out how badly the son has behaved. Why does he use emails as his method of communication? He criticizes and abuses and ends the email on a loving note assuring his love despite the wrongs he is blaming others for. When a reply is sent he cleverly twists and changes the meaning. It’s almost as if the emails fulfill a need for him. Our decision to delete all further emails has now been made. I put an instant stop to it not wanting to enter into his mind-control emails.

Destructive hobbies are hardly a new phenomenon. Irrational behavior escapes rational explanation. Don’t even try to understand it. As you have already done, encourage other family members to delete all of his emails without opening them. Declare the family will only engage in face-to-face communication, in the presence of several people, when this relative declares he has something to say.

Remember:
1. If you feed it, it will grow!
2. You cannot reason (successfully) with unreasonable people (yet reasonable people try to do it all the time!).