Posts tagged ‘moving in together’

October 15, 2008

How can I help his son feel more comfortable?

by Rod Smith

I have known my boyfriend for eight months and recently moved in with him. He has a son (11) and a daughter (15) who come every Wednesday and every second weekend. My three young children live with us. When we discussed the move with all the children together they seemed very happy. We discussed house rules and who would be sharing rooms. So far all has worked well with four of the five children. His son however complains of headaches and stomach aches and makes comments like ‘I would rather be at mom’s house’ and ‘I need time alone.’ My son has moved into his room with him and they get on quite well. His son had his father to himself for about four years where they did everything together. I understand that this must be very difficult adjustment for him but it is causing some conflict between his father and me. How I can help him to feel more comfortable without us having to move out to let him have his father back? (Shortened)

Do all you can to get out of their way. It’s the father’s issue, not yours. Regard it as a pre-existing condition. I am surprised only one child is reacting to the change. I will say more on this tomorrow.