Supporting change in those whom we love

by Rod Smith

The constant back and forth between and among people over days and months and years – the actions, the looks, sighs, what’s assumed, the smiles and the frowns – and so much more, reinforce the fact that we teach each other how to treat each other. Those who know us intimately can read and mis-read us, and even the mis-readings become part of the ongoing dialogue and the ongoing mutual training.

It is the fact that these patterns are so known and so often repeated that makes change for improvements hard for all parties concerned.

When relationships are mutual and respectful it is these qualities that allow for change.

If you or I see and shift in the manner a person whom we know well is responding to us and others, and the relationship is sound and secure, you and I embrace the shift, we know this person whom we love and respect is at liberty to try all the shifts and changes he or she wants. 

As life progresses and growth occurs, needs and wants, and people, change.

In respectful relationships we get out of each other’s way. 

We step aside.

We watch with wonder and curiosity when the people we love embrace new ideas and explore new and different ways of living and offer love, support, and applause.

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