There is a fundamental wellness truth that is obvious but missed or avoided by many. I will get to why it is avoided by so many in a moment but first, here it is. Take care of yourself, first. First, mind your own business. 

I don’t mean “mind your own business” in the ways our language and culture usually hears it, as in keep your nose out of other people’s affairs, although that is a really good idea.

By “mind your own business” I mean take care of your own behavior, concerns, worries, reactions, unhappiness, anger, dreams and ambitions – work on your own stuff – before you focus on what others are doing or not doing.

Many conflicts are avoided in my home when I take care of my own attitude rather than get derailed by what my sons are doing or not doing. My sons are easy targets if I am unhappy with myself. The minute I focus my frustrations on them and not on my reactions and responses to what’s going on in me, things get derailed in our home.

I think this approach is avoided because it seems selfish – when it is the very opposite of selfishness. I think it is avoided because it is far easier to project and notice the weaknesses of others than to work on facing our own.

Posted on February 1, 2022 at 9:23 am in Difficult Relationships   |  RSS feed |   Reply   |   Trackback URL