If you have been hurt, insulted, directly or indirectly engage in a process before you act: 

First forgive. No matter what it is, first forgive. Forgiving is about you, not the other person or people. It is always the best option. It may not be the most logical or your first knee-jerk reaction but it will always be the better option. Knee-jerk reactions are usually what land us in the most trouble. So, forgive first. 

Working on this may take a day or two or even weeks, but ask yourself why exactly what you have experienced is hurting or upsetting you. Aim for a good take, a “whole” perspective. Uncover what is at the core of why this (whatever it is) has touched you in such a way? Why exactly has this (whatever it is) had the power to upset you when parallel circumstances perhaps have not?

After this “work” if it is yet necessary to confront whomever has hurt, insulted you directly or indirectly, take time to think about what life looks like out of their window. Try to see things as they see things. This could take a while.

These steps taken, you are ready to love and grow and be an agent of healing.     

Posted on July 26, 2020 at 7:56 am in Difficult Relationships   |  RSS feed |   Reply   |   Trackback URL