Archive for June 28th, 2018

June 28, 2018

Feeling it…..

by Rod Smith

For as much as I have traveled and for as much as my sons have traveled I am feeling anxious today. I am very anxious.

Nate, my youngest son (16) is setting off tomorrow for his first solo flight.

He’s headed to my niece and her husband and their family in Terrigal, Australia.

To eliminate possible complications I booked his journey to include only one plane change on both his outward and return journey and that change will be in Houston, Texas. I’ve photocopied his passport, checked and re-checked his Electronic Travel Authority, done his laundry, and I am in the process of packing his bags.

Every possible and reasonable travel snafu, like extended delays, cancelled flights, lost baggage, and inquisitions at borders, has visited my swirling head and it usually happens around three in the morning.

I will breathe a sigh of relief (as I know his brother will, too) when we hear he’s landed and safe in the home of beloved family.

So, the next time you read my work and I am getting on some parent’s case about anxiety or over-functioning for his or her children, feel free to drop me a reminder about what it was like for me to send Nate off to Australia – and I will back off.

June 28, 2018

Annoyed?

by Rod Smith

When you’re annoyed and if you’re anything like me:

·      You probably can’t access the most thinking, helpful, objective, capacities of your brain in that very moment. I can’t, usually. That’s fine. Being annoyed occasionally comes with the human package. If you can just take a moment to tell yourself that it is in these moments that we are most positioned and most vulnerable to say the “wrong” thing, to express unnecessary cynicism, spread negativity, and to hurt people we need and people we love. Such results are not usually helpful. Hold onto yourself. This too shall pass. I try to do this. Occasionally I’m successful.

·      When you look back (hours, days, weeks later) on what it was that was the source of your annoyance  (if you recall it at all), know that you are quite healthy if it causes you somewhat of a chuckle. I experience this sometimes. Distance and time and objectivity are remarkable tools for growth and healing. If we are honest enough to allow it.

I try to learn from the things that annoy me. I try to see them as mirrors into what’s happening in the deepest recesses of my soul. Occasionally I have found some elements of growth and maturity. What gets my goat, I’ve painfully discovered, is NEVER about someone else, it’s always MY goat.

Sometimes I find I am as immature as ever.

Sometimes, on reflection, I can tell there’s actually been some growth.