Primal themes

by Rod Smith

In formal and informal settings I have listened to people talk about their lives all of my professional life. If there are frequently-recurring thematic areas of primal longings, they would be:

  • The desire for recognition from family and peers. Many times people have told me they feel, or might as well be, invisible.
  • The desire for a meaningful work – to accomplish something that counts, to be involved in work that makes a positive difference to others.
  • The desire to be understood – for another to take the time to hear and see life through their lens. 
  • The desire to be appreciated and for that appreciation to be expressed.
  • The desire to be surrounded by beautiful things – not expensive or opulent, just beautiful. 
  • The desire to be forgiven for indiscretions large and small, benign or damaging, many of which have been harbored in a tortured memory for decades. 
  • The ache for the affirmation of a father or a father figure. I have heard boys and girls and men and women repeatedly express a craving for someone who could be fully trusted, who was a non-anxious and listening presence, who offered necessary and appropriate protection and freedom, all at the same time.

4 Comments to “Primal themes”

  1. hi i really need your email address to talk to you

  2. you may “talk” to me through the comments. I look forward to hearing from you.

  3. you gave talk at my school a few months ago and i want to talk yo you

  4. Which school? I spoke at many. ohicc@mac.com

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