by Rod Smith

The Mercury / Tuesday

What’s on the inside is what’s important……

I observe and listen. I can hardly help it. With that I do try to reserve judgment and often question if my assessments are really a window into what I need to learn about how I myself treat others. I conclude that how we speak to other people and how we treat all other people is a window into our own being and says nothing about others.

• The man who is rude and demanding in a restaurant and who belittles the server is revealing volumes about himself no matter how poor the service or the quality of the food. The adult tantrum is worse than the service or food could ever be. There are kind ways to express dissatisfaction.

• The woman who gossips about her friends and badmouths their husbands but switches and is all polite and kind when in their company is declaring just what an unhappy person she is. Her inauthenticity will be her downfall.

• The coach (any sport, any level) who yells, swears, cavorts on the sidelines reveals nothing about the team but everything about loss of perspective and a refusal to grow up. Imagine how he treats those he loves!

As I said, I am constantly evaluating. “Am I accurate or peering into a mirror?’ is the question I ask myself.

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