If you want to stimulate greater health in your family – immediate and extended – there are things you can do, all of which are simple, but not easy:

Shift your focus and attention off the members of your family and what they are doing (or not doing) or saying (or not saying). Become a total expert in your own behavior and in your own behavior only. 

You may begin to see and appreciate just how much your behavior supports or encourages what is uncomfortable for you in members of your family. 

Yes. You may begin to see how your behavior promotes or supports what you criticize in others. 

All relationships impact (shape, modify) all relationships. 

Take care of what you are doing (or not doing) and saying (or not saying) and you will see some changes begin to occur, some of which you may like and some which you may not.  

For example, the wife who complains that her husband is “a slob who won’t clean up after himself” may see that her over-functioning for him by cleaning up after her husband is supporting the behavior in him she most despises!  

The dad who complains that his children are always scrolling on their phones may want to use his for calls and texts only so his observations and expectations of his children gain a leg to stand on.

Good morning, INDIANA