June 12, 2023
by Rod Smith
There are a few ways I can tell when an unwell client is gathering strength and becoming well……
He begins to speak up. He resists “falling into line” and acquiescing to others when he’d previously kept his mouth shut and conformed to the expectations of others.
She starts to think things through. She turns consequences and ramifications over in her mind before agreeing with or accepting my suggestions. She trusts her own insights more than she trusts her therapist’s insights about her.
He develops a growing “bird’s eye view” of his life. He begins to see with greater and greater clarity how seemingly “small” decisions of repeated healthy choices rapidly usher in larger positive outcomes than can be anticipated.
She begins to enjoy the rewards of making difficult but healthy choices. She wakes up most days with growing anticipation despite her substantial challenges.
He sees and feels more and more courageous and confident about his own life even while appreciating the humility required of those who desire to live meaningful lives.
She expresses thanks and appreciation for her life despite its struggles and anticipates being an agent of hope to others with similar challenges.
Posted in Attraction, Blended families, Boundaries, Communication, Differentiation, Family, Family Systems Theory, Grace, Leadership, Parenting/Children, Recovery, Responsive people, Voice |
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June 12, 2023
by Rod Smith
Monday / Family Systems
THINKING
- A “new” way of thinking – not really. There are many ways in which you are already a seasoned and expert in systemic thinking. Do you drive? Ever thought of how complex an International Airport is?
- Linear Thinking or Systemic Thinking
- Non-Living Systems / Living Systems / The Body of Christ. 1Co 12:12 The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body.
BEING
- Time to focus on SELF and to get focus off OTHERS – you are a PERSON – become an expert in YOUR behavior, The People you love will probably survive without your intense focus but they might sizzle (or fry) from it.
- Jesus had a thorough self-knowledge and understood His relationships and was never taken off guard by others. Jesus Perfected the art of DIFFERENTIATION OF SELF – engage the life-long process to do the same.
FAMILY SYSTEM
- Family or Origin – size and position matters.
- You are part of a NETWORK of RELATIONSHIPS – it is called a FAMILY and you are part of a GET to know yourself WITHIN that system.
- Why I love Bowen Theory and Family Systems – there are at least 5 reasons, maybe more.
Your DAY 1 challenges:
- Name relationships where you could do with more space (freedom, room to move) – be careful now.
- Name relationships where you could do with more intimacy, more feedback, closeness– be careful now.
- Name the people whose behavior you are an expert in at the expense of focusing on your behavior.
- Has anything taught today caused you to experience some pain or sadness – are you willing to name those areas to someone important to you?
I am I, You are You, We are We, Let Us not ConFuse The Three
Posted in Family Systems Theory |
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