As children, many of us experience a measure of sibling rivalry; we vie with our brothers and sisters for our parents’ attention. We get into habits of thinking that we are in competition with them. We can either feel powerful or powerless in our relationships.

As adults however the situation is different.

An older brother is no longer more important than I am – we are now both adults. A younger sister is no longer little and more cute that I am – we are both adults. We need to invest time and energy in getting to know one another as equals, leaving behind us out-dated ways of thinking. We must no longer ask our parents to mediate, nor to be the “passers-on” of information. It takes courage to step out of habits of a lifetime, and first steps can feel very strange, even risky. If we can manage our anxiety, keep a level head, take time to keep a healthy perspective, then maybe we have a chance to change entrenched patterns of relating that are serving no-one, and change our family histories too!

Write to Jo@TakeUpYourLife.com to make direct Email contact with Jo Russel. Jo lives in West Kilbride, Scotland where she has a private counseling practice.

Posted on July 15, 2009 at 10:31 pm in Difficult Relationships   |  RSS feed |   Reply   |   Trackback URL