Q: My husband is an alcoholic. I have to lie for him. He gets angry if I don’t
You don’t have to lie for anybody; not your husband, boss or mother. It’s always your choice. At the same time, I understand how telling the truth might be difficult.
Decide to tell the truth, first to your husband. Tell him your days of lying on his behalf are over and that you will tell the truth as clearly and as kindly as you are able, to everyone. Tell him he can lie for himself if he so chooses but you will no longer cover his tracks. You will probably face some short-lived backlash but, hold onto yourself, stand firm. Get the support you might need from a close friend.
Most alcoholics have people who unwittingly support their habit. Without blaming you for his behavior (for it is his arm that takes the glass to his mouth) I’d encourage you to see that every time you lie for him, you are making his behavior possible. You are supporting the very thing you know is ruining him and hurting you. Such behavior on your part serves no one, least of all the alcoholic.
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