I have taken some flack for writing that our thoughts (our thinking) are more important than our feelings.
I have never said our feelings are unimportant or ought to be dismissed or downplayed.
You might have noticed constant reminders in self-help-type writings that we have no control over what others think of us.
This is so.
I want to go a smidgeon further.
How, what, and when we think of others is of pivotal importance and it is (largely) within our control.
How (positive, negative, with anger, joy, or judgement) we think of others (individuals, groups, near and far) shapes who we are (character).
What (positive, negative, truth, rumour) we think of others shapes our behavior.
When (rarely, on occasion, routinely, obsessively) we think of others shapes attitudes, productivity and content.
The “how,” “what” and “when” occurring within us is vastly more important than what others think, or we believe others think, about us.
Take kindness and thinking kind thoughts and planning kind actions.
It is good for us.
It’s a day-changer.
Really, it’s a life-changer.
Unkindness from any source reveals (usually) nothing about the target and everything about the source.
“Love your enemies?” said Jesus.
Why?
I of course don’t know all the reasons He said this.
I have a hunch that it’s at least partly because love is good for all of us.
Learning to love our enemies is the ultimate test of character and shapes us into the kinds of people we really want to be.
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