Being Left Out

Finding out your child has NOT been invited to an event that all the other children are attending can be very painful. Do you say something? Do you fight it? Do you let your child know? I’d suggest you talk about this before it occurs or as soon as possible if it does: 

• Acknowledge the hurt. Very few things are as painful for a child as finding out about a birthday party that’s already occurred among friends. The pain is real, appropriate, and expected no matter how logical the explanation or innocent the oversight. 

• Failure to include your child may have nothing to do with your child (or you). But, examine yourselves. Is there anything your child is doing, or you are doing, that makes it easier for others NOT to include your child? At least face the possibility others may consider you or your child difficult. 

• Suggest your child address the omission as politely and kindly as possible with the friend. Of course age is critical here – but a stronger backbone will result! 

• Encourage your child to understand the difference between hurt and damage. He or she may be hurt, but it is unlikely the experience has the power to impart damage.

• Encourage and engage in zero payback or retribution. 

Posted on March 6, 2024 at 6:40 am in Difficult Relationships   |  RSS feed |   Reply   |   Trackback URL