Boundaries

by Rod Smith

A boundary is a line (usually invisible) that separates a person from all other people.

Each person is responsible for the wellness of his or her own boundaries.

Indications of poor or troubled boundaries:

  • Sharing too much too soon.
  • Falling in love quickly and with anyone who reaches out.
  • Being preoccupied with someone.
  • Going against your values to please someone.
  • Hoping someone you meet will have poor boundaries.
  • Accepting food, gifts, touch, or sex you do not want.
  • Taking for the sake of getting.
  • Giving for the sake of giving.
  • Letting someone be in charge of your life.
  • Allowing someone else to say what you feel and see.
  • Believing someone can and should anticipate your needs.
  • Being moody and withdrawn to get attention.
  • Expecting people to read your mind and know what you want or need.
  • Habitually stealing the agenda, taking center stage, occupying the spotlight.
  • Falling apart to get care.
  • Eating for destructive reasons or with destructive results.

The above list is from observing self and others and collated from a variety of sources over many years. I’d love to acknowledge all the sources and would if I had them.

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