Son (13) comes home from dad’s house with bruises…..

by Rod Smith

Reader’s Letter: “I am divorced but live with a wonderful man and have a very stable and loving home environment for my son (13). My ex-husband and his new wife have boys aged 17 and 13. All three boys get on very well. My son arrived home from the weekend with his dad and showed me a black bruise on his arm. When I asked him how he got the bruise I was told that his dad had made a new rule: if the boys don’t brush their teeth by 9.30am, don’t pick up clothes, or use bad language, the boys are allowed to punch each other as punishment. So my son was punched in the arm by the seventeen-year-old for not brushing his teeth. I contacted my ex-husband about this and he told me to keep my nose out of his affairs how he runs his home. Your advice would be greatly appreciated.”

Everything pertaining to your son is always your business – keep your nose in it. Meet with your son’s stepmother, who will surely share your concern, and request this barbaric approach to cleaner teeth, rooms and mouths, stops! Such behavior among three boys can do none any possible good. But be wise; the children do get along. Be unrelenting in seeking your son’s absolute safety. “Running his home” is about who vacuums the house, who takes out the trash – abusing your son does not quite fit into that category!

2 Comments to “Son (13) comes home from dad’s house with bruises…..”

  1. Michelle's avatar

    I have a question regarding this. I am a grandmother. My son was a single parent and great father for many years. The woman he married a couple years ago is very verbally, emotionally, and physically abusive. We have a strong suspicion that she is bi-polar or something!

    She ruins our special holiday/family occasions with her foul moods and constant aggressive put downs, bitching, and demands. She will go on for hours without stopping. Never listens to anything anyone else says – it is always only about her. When she started doing this again this year on my grandson’s birthday in front of family and friends – totally ruining the celebratory mood for everyone, I finally requested that if she had a problem, could she please take it up with her husband later in private.

    She went crazy and switched the target from my son and grandson to me – accusing me of interfering and calling me names, etc. It has become so bad this past year that I can’t hear her voice without getting sick at my stomach. I’ve kept my mouth shut for several years now and don’t feel that asking her to take it up later in private was a wrong request.

    What do you think? Please answer. I am very concerned about the abuse my son and grandson are enduring. She refuses any suggestion of family counseling as she “is not the problem” everyone else is. She has no relationship with her own family, and now no friends and is gradually cutting our family out as well. Her own children hate her for the abuse they have endured and can’t stand being around her.

  2. mmagnolia's avatar

    Dear Ms. Michelle: May 17th is a long distance from here at August 6!

    If solution is still out-of-hand, PLEASE contact your local helpline and/or eldercare organizations. If you’re uncomfortable reporting the abuse FOR NOW—at least reach out, TALK with someone near athand, if only for Your sake, First!

    Get some peace on your end, AND perspectives from another person certainly can help. Whatever You do, DO something! Doing nothing is not an option!

    Have Heart with Best Blessings!

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