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The sad, sad life of children who have everything…

by Rod Smith

My heart goes out to children who have everything. I know the son of a friend whose name I will say is Christopher. He is twelve and he has everything. At least his parents think he does. The slightest suggestion of Christopher being bored, lonely or short-tempered, they take him shopping. His very loving parents want him to have all the things they did not have when they were growing up. His environment suggests they have kept their word.

Christopher goes without nothing that opens, shuts, sails, sings, flies, slides, glows, flashes, rides or thrills – his room is an altar to the god of kid consumption, of clothing labels, sports clothing and sports equipment, sound equipment, musical instruments, the latest DVD technology (a VCR lies abandoned like it were a primitive tool), iPods, cellular phones and computers. He has two computers: one for games and the other for his “online life” and music.

Yet Christopher is usually bored, angry or both. He doesn’t know where to start having fun. This makes Christopher rather upset but his anxiety is placated by his ability to kill (and I am not kidding) virtual kids he creates, then sends catapulting into brick walls in skateboard, car or bike accident on his TV monitor. This seems to make Christopher quite happy – but only for a very short time.

Posted on May 17, 2006 at 2:39 pm in Adolescence, Children, Family   |  RSS feed |   Reply   |   Trackback URL

5 Responses to “The sad, sad life of children who have everything…”

    
  1. journeytomom's avatar
    journeytomom
    May 25, 2006 at 12:52 pm

    I just picked up a book on this very subject in my local library:
    How Much Is Enough? Everything You Need to Know to Steer Clear of Overindulgence and Raise Likeable, Responsible and Respectful Children by Jean Illsley Clarke, PH.D., Connie Dawson, PH.D. and David Bredehoft, PH.D. They identify three types of overindulgence: “too much,” over-nurturing, and soft structure. So far it appears to have some very good insights and will be well worth the read. It’s also appropriate for your previous post on “loving children too much.”

    Reply
  2. Rod Smith's avatar
    Rod E. Smith, MSMFT
    May 25, 2006 at 1:51 pm

    Thanks, JTMom — it is the not-so-subtle form of abuse for which few are held accountable. let’s keep reading and writing on these topics in the hope of saving a few from such indulgence. I like to call them Hope-Diamond Children (treating them as if they are the only child in the world!)

    Reply
  3. charlotte lipton's avatar
    charlotte lipton
    May 28, 2006 at 7:35 am

    Oh dear so sad parents giving their children everthing they did not have as children.They do not see what they are doing to their child, but it is done out of love so everthingis excused.
    What they dont see is the child as an adult being self obessed and spoilt and expecting every one to treat them in this manner.
    Well some point in time they will have their eyes opened to the real world and it will be a big shock, it could cause physcologial problems if not addressed early.

    Reply
  4. Mandy's avatar
    Mandy
    January 2, 2007 at 4:55 pm

    I have to agree that some parents are harming their children without knowing it. It goes back to the two income family thing in my opinion. Both parents work so they do what they can to show there love for them in ways of monetary value since they can’t show it with hands on time with them. They buy stuff thinking I’m working so my child can have nice things. Well this is where it goes downhill. The child starts to expect this stuff, probably to fill a void in his or her life. What happens to these kids when they grow into teenagers then adults. I’m afraid to find out!

    Reply

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