My husband has children from a previous marriage. After four years of marriage I want a baby with him. Every time I mention it, he tells me what having a child will do to my body. I wonder whether he is just happy with the children he has and doesn’t want children with me. I want a baby with him. I think it would seal us. I’m scared I will lose my figure and whether he will love the child the same as he loves his other children. (Letter edited)
Children are not glue. If having children ‘seals’ couples, he would still be sealed to his former wife. It is very possible your husband is resisting having another child. Knowing how much work and investment is required, he might be loath to begin again.
If your husband loves children he has already fathered, he is likely to love any child he fathers. Besides, babies have a way forging their way into a parent’s heart even if the parent is not overly desirous of having another child.
Avoiding a baby because of what pregnancy and childbirth might do to your body is shortsighted. The demands of parenthood will hopefully dislodge your figure from its pre-eminent position in both of your lives.
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