A stepchild writes…

by Rod Smith

“Stepchildren are not guests in the stepparents’ households but were usually there first. In the eyes of the stepchild, they are not at fault for the mess and were thrown into the disruption. Divorce is a selfish thing. However, this does not mean that they are allowed to run the house, but they need love and kindness from stepparents. I feel very unwelcome in my father’s house. I have not been allowed to have a good relationship with my father, although I have tried everything. I feel disrespected. Children really need to know that both of their parents support them. They need their stepparents to respect and support the (biological) relationship.

“A wise decision for a stepmother is to leave the discipline to the father for a time, until they have established a caring relationship with their stepchild. They need to know their stepparent will allow them to feel comfortable as part of the family and not be excluded because they are not their children. They need to be careful to not come between the child and her biological parent. They need to realize that the child just wants to feel loved and cared for by all. This requires a lot of patience and understanding.” (Edited for space)

2 Comments to “A stepchild writes…”

  1. This is pretty true. I even think that even when the stepmother starts doing a bit more disciplining to always leave the big stuff to the dad. I’ve been around my stepchildren for 3 years. They call me “Mom.” Not because they had to but because they asked if they could.

    But I never overstep my bounds and when something heavy happens I always hand it over to my husband to handle. He does the same with my children. It is always best for a parent and step-parent to know, and be comfortable, with their place.

  2. I wish that were true in all households. I am a step child, there are 3 of us from my biological mom. Step mom got there before the divorce, until she married my dad. She has always played a malicious role in the background.

    at 10, all i know is my world had changed 4 the worst.

    today she lie to my dad about stuff Iv done and its never tru. my dad even hates my boyfriend cuz she lied about him. now my dad and i have no relationship, coz of her lies.

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